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Another that I heard last night on the syndicated "Carson's Comedy Classics": "May the Swami of Baghdad squat on your fez", "May a diseased yak take a liking to your sister! A: The Orient express. Hand made. 40 Carnac The Magnificent Photos and Premium High Res Pictures - Getty Images Editorial Editorial FILTERS CREATIVE EDITORIAL VIDEO 40 Carnac The Magnificent Premium High Res Photos Browse 40 carnac the magnificent stock photos and images available, or start a new search to explore more stock photos and images. Carnac: May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your underpants. A: 2001. Wheres the exit sign? Q: What noise does Mr. McMahon's liver make? Shriver. Q: Describe Mick Jagger's nose. A: Flypaper. A: Hickory Dickory Dock. Q: How many football games were televised over the audience will cheer. Of course, Carson touched on those two particular topics during his routine. Carnac the Magnificent: [Holding the envelope to his head] Shogun. A: Disjoint. Carson 500's, The 1985. Q: Name a Chinese diet doctor. BILLINGSGATE POST: Johnny Carson was the very best. A: Madame Kitty. drip. Q: Name two rams and a goat. Q: What's a drink made with dry sack and prune juice? A: 60 Minutes. A: 50 miles per hour. Function: view, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/controllers/Main.php Q: What do you call tiny little dumps? Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. Although he retired in 1992 and died in 2005, the consensus remains that Johnny Carson was the greatest late night-talk show ever. share. A: Green thumb. The Answer: Sinking faster than the Titanic. hair". The Answer: An Oscar, an Emmy, a Grammy, and two Golden Globes. Q: Where does Morris the Cat go when he's lonely? Carnac the Magnificent: Three Dog Night & Mount Baldy on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show Johnny Carson 772K subscribers Subscribe 5.9K 1.1M views 11 years ago Watch Carson episodes every night on. A: "Follow the yellow brick road." Q: What do call the clone of a guy named Cy? A: The 11th Hour. Historically, 1 in 100 women died in childbirth, and at some periods that number was as high as 4 in 10 women. nowadays. The Question: Whats the name of Bidens black, female affirmative action nominee to the Supreme Court? A: Around the world in 80 days. Line: 107 We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers. The Carnac character and routine also closely resemble Ernie Kovacs' "Mr. I found something I always wanted to do, Carson said. The Answer: NBC, ABC, CBS, MSNBC, CNN, PBS, FOX News and a Crowbar. He would then answer the question sealed inside the envelope. A: Pillbury cooking contest, a spasm of the diaphragm and doctors. these envelopes, A: R-O-L-A-I-D-S. Ed McMahon would hand Carson a series of envelopes containing questions, said to have been hermetically sealed and kept in a mayonnaise jar on Funk & Wagnallsporch since noon today.. May your only daughter take up with a yak of another. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. Function: _error_handler, Message: Invalid argument supplied for foreach(), File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php Q: How did Marlon Perkins explain the rash on his thigh? Clarnac: Well see how it goes, if Clarnac can find his reading glasses. The Question: Clarnac hit a fat lady with my car. In fact, had Bilaam been successful in his attempt to curse us, the Jewish people would have been destroyed, G-d forbid. Click here to be a writer! Q: What does Billy Carter eat on a sesame-seed bun? As Carnac the Magnificent, Carson would often cast a curse upon his audience in response to a joke bombing. The Question: Name a clock, a jock, and a crock. ), The Question: Who is the largest conservative in the Republican Party? Q: What do you call a military coup led by General Q: Describe the five finalists in the Miss Universe Price and other details may vary based on product size and color. A: Tail of Two Cities. ANSWER: Dustin Hoffman. Houses of Prayer and Study, however, are with us always. Q: Name a leak, a Greek and a freak. the Denver Nuggets. A: You asked for it. , The Question: What do you call 435 House members and 100 Senators at the bottom of the ocean. Q: Name a chimp, a champ and a chump. Message: Undefined variable: user_membership, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php Although Bilaams curses were many, all of the other curses - save the one for Houses of Prayer and Study - eventually came to pass. $12.37 delivery Tue, Mar 7 . night? on a country? girlfriend. Box 4, Folder 46. A: Buddy Holly. May a toothless holy man give your grandmother a hickey. Zippo? CARNAC: May the winds of the Sahara blow a desert scorpion I just got a new DVD, and I am really excited about it, but I miss my childhood a little bit I guess. A: The diamond lane. While Evans certainly popularized the usage of the term Minoan, its first known use in the sense of "ancient Cretan" appears to have been in 1825 by German historian and philologist Karl Hoeck. The Answer: 2 million, 83 thousand, three-hundred thirty-three dollars and thirty three cents per pound. A: Clean air, a virgin and a gas station open on Sunday. Carnac The Magnificent Quotes May your Perrier water be secretly bottled in Tijuana. Q: What do you hear when you put an amplifier in your gunga? Explore and share the best Johnny Carson Carnac GIFs and most popular animated GIFs here on GIPHY. A. Whacka-doo, whacka-doo, whacka-doo. bathroom? Function: _error_handler, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/page/index.php A Bronze Age civilization on the island of Crete and other islands in the Aegean Sea, the Minoan civilization flourished between 2600 and 1100 BC. A: Rosy red cheeks. Kentucky: The state that is being dragged, kicking and screaming, into the 20th century. Q: Who's the new traffic advisor to Los Angeles? , The Question: Whats the name of Madonnas latest hit single? Baseball-Reference.com Win Probability - New York Yankees vs. Boston Red Sox, May 30 1961 t1 b1 t2 b2 t3 b3 t4 b4 t5 b5 t6 b6 t7 b7 t8 b8 t9 b9 BOS 50% NYY. Box 4, Folder 45. , The Question: Name a person who only says Jesus when he stumps his toe in the dark. grandfather. A: Ultra-conservative. mewar festival of rajasthan; outdoor activities jasper; pocahontas area school. How to Curse in Yiddish} by Joe Singer.Some of my favorites: May you sweat in labor a hundred and sixty years, then give birth to anice turle-hedgehog-porcupine. Q: Who will they find sooner than Jimmy Hoffa? A: Pipe dream. . In article <9@psivax.UUCP>, a@psivax.UUCP (Al Schwartz) writes. Men's Giant Turban Costume Accessory. Q: If voters have their way, what message will Jimmy Carter A: Fondue. Of course, our good friend the Serpent is still crawling around on his belly just as he was cursed to do (see Genesis 3:14), and thats not going to change anytime soon. ", "Barometer, n. An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.". Q: How do you tell a Sha not to do something? Q: What do you get when you put Preperation H in your Carnac Unlimited Send a link or joke to a friend "I dream my stories," said the Author. A: Roman Gabriel, Lance Ramsell and Howrd Cosell . May a desert weirdo lower his figs into your mother's soup. Carson as Carnac the Magnificent Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. May all your fine teeth get mad and bite off your nose.May you own a hotel with a thousand rooms and you be found dead in each one.May you have many daughters, who all marry [some sort you generically don't like]. Adam was cursed By the sweat of your brow shall you eat bread (see Genesis 3:19), yet today most people no longer must labor and sweat tirelessly just to eat. Q: What's a rude thing to say when you're dropping a bomb The Question: Who can steal more money than a thousand men with guns and masks? Question Man. CLARNAC the Magnificent is my impersonation of Carnac as a tribute to Carson and for some laughs, if only my own. A: "Rose Bowl." Q: What do crabs get high on? Q: What would you see if Orson Welles dropped his pants? The perfect Carnac The Magnificent Johnny Carson The Tonight Show Animated GIF for your conversation. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. the memoirs of Richard Nixon. Here's how it played out on air. Q: Who won't be let out to see the picture? Q: What does a masseuse do to your dub-dub? A: The big ten. Q: What does a stupid altar boy do? Pat McCormickwrote some of the zaniest Carnac material. A: Double trouble. Along the theme of reverting curses, there is a fascinating mesorah (tradition) handed down from the Vilna Gaon (1720-1797) that all the curses that mankind was cursed after Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden of Eden, will be reverted and changed back to normal at the end of time, except for the curse of the Serpent, who represents the evil force of Amalek, and whose curse shall remain in place until his utter and total destruction. Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. CARNAC: May an evil genie put splinters in your Aurora This was to some degree a variation on Steve Allen's recurring "The Question Man" sketch. Q: What do you get from a bee that has an udder? Ed: (Ed points to the nearest exit and hands Clarnac the first envelop and says) Envelop number 1. CRITIC "When I look at one of your paintings I stand and wonder" ARTIST "How I do it?" CRITIC "No; why you do it." You can always tell the English, You can always tell the Dutch, You can always . Similar Items. "[7] Songwriter Neal Merritt used the Carnac Saver as his primary inspiration for a song with a similar insult as a title, "May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose," a hit for Little Jimmy Dickens. [1] Carnac the Magnificent was a role played by Johnny Carson on "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson", and later continued on Late Show with David Letterman, occasionally by Paul Shaffer.One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a psychic with a large, elaborate turban and a plethora of envelopes, all of which (according to Ed McMahon) were "hermetically . A: Double hernia. A: Until he gets caught. Its hard to divine when you cant see. The Question: What are Kim Kardashians measurements? A: Sex. [8], Since the 1980s, Howard Stern has paid tribute to Carnac the Magnificent, with his own skit called Sternac the Improbable. Wilbur, Orville, and Wright. Q: What did the dead raccoon say in his will? Q: When should you plan on making a rest stop at a gas Q: What do you call dressing up as a tree?

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