The Secret News (News ticker sound effect), Type out all lyrics, even repeating song parts like the chorus, Lyrics should be broken down into individual lines. Local elections, special elections, and mid-terms, especially. Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. They don't care about the planet. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. See they don't DECIDE; they DETERMINE. MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> The table has tilted folks. Funny, Humor, Beer. Everybody says they suck. That's because now he's feeling the heat and so as time passes and more evidence comes in he suddenly changes directions and tells us: POLITICIAN:WERE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS! It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. And so, with all of this in mind, folks, I offer you my revised list of the Two Commandments: THOU SHALT KEEP THY RELIGION TO THYSELF! document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. Some parents deserve respect. Ive read it dozens of times. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. Carlin, for 40-years, was one of the greatest comedians ever. Fuck hope!. They [Catholic teachers] would fall back on, Well, its a mystery.[2]. Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. Web. That's why we need people who can make the TOUGH DECISIONS. I think I have done that bit', BAFTA acceptance, Leading Actress - 2019, Axel Scheffler: 'The book wasn't called 'No Room on the Broom! From the late 1980s, Carlin's routines focused on sociocultural criticism of American society. m o n t c l a i r . Copyright 2017 iComedyTV.com. Everybodys at the mall, scratchin his ass, pickin his nose, takin his credit card out of his fanny pack and buyin a pair of sneakers with lights in them. But, he is wrong here. 0000015335 00000 n
Everybody complains about politicians. e d u / e t d)/Rect[230.8867 233.3227 416.9463 245.0414]/StructParent 4/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> People are stupid because, well, people are stupid. Now you can just hide behind a screen and fire off your misspelled, grammatically incorrect rants to thousands of strangers. You're just trying to impress people you don't even know. . Nothing wrong with the planet. GEORGE CARLIN: I want to tell you something about words that I think is important. TOUGH DECISIONS like: POLITICIAN (PLANNING):HOW MUCH SOFT MONEY CAN I EXPECT TO COLLECT IN EXCHANGE FOR MY CORE VALUES? You caused the problem. BUT WHEN I DO, I'LL ADVISE YOU. You got people spouting their opinions left and right, like they're some kind of expert on the subject. (But First, Answer Me This). Everyone's taking pictures of themselves, all the time. Yes, all the words are quite impolite. And nobody seems to notice. endobj Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. But theres a reason. Everyone experiences pain, of course. Here it is: Why are there ten? 0000003901 00000 n
George Carlin was one of the most well-known and beloved comedians of all time. You know, in the old days, if you wanted to share your opinion with someone, you had to look them in the eye and say it to their face. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. Reading the text, it sounds like a reasonably serious essaywell, sort of. We dont have people like that in this country. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(English Language and Literature Commons)/Rect[137.2383 212.4906 328.3613 224.2094]/StructParent 5/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Maybe something else sucks around here. I just wanna put this behind me and that's an expression we hear a lot these days in all walks of lives. He spoke about his book "Brain Droppings" and answered questions submitted by the audience. The shit they shuffle around every four years doesnt mean a fuckin thing. Hi speech lovers,With costs of hosting website and podcast, this labour of love has become a difficult financial proposition in recent times. Michael Cooney was a speechwriter for @, George Carlin: 'Politicians don't actually say things, they INDICATE them', National Press Club - 1999. http://www.ravendevelopers.com/blog/2013/0 Bernie Sanders: 'So the next time you hear me attacked as a socialist, remember this', Georgetown University - 2015, Jimmy Carter: 'The threat is nearly invisible in ordinary ways. Its what our system produces. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) "We're so self-important. Were fucked. 191 0 obj George Carlin Interview Transcription: George Carlin: This is George Carlin. startxref `XX /;VU}`M%VO #5Zfb-> 192 0 obj Yeah, right. Apparently no one has ever claimed that only a small portion of something (LAUGHS) was blown out of proportion. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. Been through earthquakes, volcanoes, plate tectonics, continental drift, solar flares, sun spots, magnetic storms, the magnetic reversal of the poleshundreds of thousands of years of bombardment by comets and asteroids and meteors, worlwide floods, tidal waves, worldwide fires, erosion, cosmic rays, recurring ice agesAnd we think some plastic bags, and some aluminum cans are going to make a difference? Let's get started! Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. As I say, they're my work, they're my play, they're my passion. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. <<76B7883B53B3B2110A00D082ECFCFC7F>]/Prev 777933>> I think the list of commandments was deliberately and artificially inflated to get it up to ten. We're so obsessed with ourselves and our own little worlds that we can't even have a real conversation or a meaningful interaction with someone without checking our phones every five minutes. You know, say, boy, he really . They OWN YOU. THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. It goes WAY beyond his famous Seven Words You Cant Say on Television (also classic). Well where do people think these politicians come from? They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? 4 Mar. People are so quick to judge and attack each other over the smallest things. Fuck em! POLITICIAN:WERE ADDRESSING THE PROBLEM AND WE'LL SOON BE PROCEEDING. Moses could have carried them down the hill in his pocket. POLITICIAN:THERE IS NO EVIDENCE, NO ONE HAS PROVEN ANYTHING EVENTUALLY I'LL BE EXONERATED. People post pictures of themselves and their lives, trying to create a narrative that they're happy, successful, and popular. Save the planet, we don't even know how to take care of ourselves yet. Well, if you ask me, it's more like the land of the self-obsessed and the home of the vain. To learn more, check out our transcription guide or visit our transcribers forum, Comedian George Carlins take on The Ten Commandments. Because if its really just the fault of these politicians, then where are all the other bright people of conscience? And secondly, I dont vote because I believe if you vote you have no right to complain. He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. It's just a curated version of ourselves that we want to present to the world. Add in a bit of effective protest and it might even turn a bit faster.). As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. The Wealthy the REAL owners! They should be based on the parents' performance. In this paper, I examine George Carlin's stance on . Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. They got you by the balls. You can't have an opinion anymore without being labeled as something. If you have selfish, ignorant citizensif you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gunna get selfish, ignorant leaders. George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. THINGS ARE MOVING FASTER NOW, MISTAKES WERE MADE. Thank you. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . This is an incomplete transcript made by Raven Developers. Because at the end of the day, social media is just a bunch of zeros and ones floating around in cyberspace. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Carlin is funny as hell. 0000000716 00000 n
So let me tell you something. Several reasons. His parents split up when he was an infant because his . Required fields are marked *. Let's all tell each other what we're doing every minute of the day. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. They want your retirement money. I'M NOT SURE; I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET (LAUGHS). BRAND: That's comedian George. endobj And let's not forget about YouTube. Im talking about the real owners now, the BIG owners! I don't words that conceal reality. George Carlin - National Press Club May 19, 1999. Its never going to get any better, dont look for it, be happy with what youve got. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. Then share it far and wide with the little green button. this is my tribute and way of promoting George Carlin's work. You have no choice! [5], Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. Then, as the controversy continues to heat up, he moves to his next level of complaint: POLITICIAN:THE WHOLE THING HAS BEEN BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. But I'm sure they will still remove this. His satirical comments and relentless attacking a damaged system that unfairly trounced on the rights of its . 124 Copy quote. THOU SHALT NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS . Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. These people on social media, they're not your friends. You know, those posts that pretend to be modest, but really they're just a way of showing off. Theyre not interested in that. Recorded on November 5, 2005, Beacon Theater, New York City, New York. Hendra, a writer and comedian, talks with Rebecca . This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. They speak of course with great caution, because they must take care not to actually say anything. And so when finally all the facts come out and our subject seems quite guilty he employs that sublime use of the passive voice: POLITICIAN:MISTAKES WERE MADE. I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? Anthony Hopkins is a pantheist-Catholic-agnostic who believes strongly in God. This shit they shuffle around every four years? They want your retirement money. People go on there, they play with the animals, they pet them, they feed them, but they don't get any real interaction. The planet is fine. Global Search Search In. m o n t c l a i r . The fact that Americans will probably remain willfully ignorant of the big red, white and blue dick thats being jammed up their assholes everyday, because the owners of this country know the truth. everybody complains about politicians. And term limits aint gunna do ya any good. They dont fall out of the sky. (CLAPS, LAUGHS). This is the kind of shit youd expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. 160 Copy quote. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) They own and control the corporations. Fuck em! You wanna know what a friend is? That's a big activity here in Washington! It's supposed to connect you with other people, but it's just a way of avoiding real human contact. But here's the thing, folks. You, and I, are not in the big club. Isnt it a bit ironic, though, that the audience is laughing at all this when, essentially, Carlin is saying to them, directly to their faces, that they are stupid? This is not good work. (LAUGHS). The truth is, obedience and respect should not be granted automatically. And we've all bought into it. George has been quoted as calling this his favourite HBO special of them all due to its continuous flow-on nature and high standard of writing. 0000000016 00000 n
Real connection comes from being present with other people, from having meaningful conversations, from doing things together. Whatever happened WellWell he's about to find out! We dont have people like that in this country. They're not your friends. They dont pass through a membrane from some other reality. (LAUGHS). From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens.
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